Torchwood: I'm feelin' crotchety!
Nov. 19th, 2007 10:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
foxmonkey[Pieced together from email messages and a message board post or two because I am the laziest LJer ever, and writing about Torchwood gets me all whipped into a frenzy. Why whip myself into a new frenzy, when I can recycle old vats of bile? I give you The Foxmonkey Torchwood Ramblings, TM.]
If Gwen crossed over into the Doctor Who universe, I'd stop watching the show. Immediately.
Gwen and Jack are completely mismatched and would be hideously wrong together, no matter what the writers think. If they ever hook up, I may have to stop watching.
I hate Gwen. I hate that she has more screentime than everyone else, including John Barrowman, who's the reason I started watching the show. I hate that when Jack is onscreen, his time is monopolized by Gwen. She's way too over the Mary Sue line for me to connect with her as a character. I love it when Jack rips into her -- and that's probably really evil of me.
OH MY GOD, I want to smack them all (except Jack) sometimes, and if he's paired up with Gwen next season, I'll want to smack him all the time. And possibly boot him in the ass as well. We'll see.
Ianto is just too adorable and I want to eat him with a spoon. I'd like to see him take Gwen's place in the field; Gwen could have the major domo duties since she likes all that linear thinking and by-the-book stuff. ;-)
Overall though, I like the show and I cannot wait until the fabulous Martha Jones (from Doctor Who season three) shows up. Much love for Martha! I'm gay not only for Martha, but for the adorably gorgeous actress who portrays her, the adorably gorgeous Freema Agyeman. Freema is my official new girl crush. But I digress.
I love when people are open about any- and everything. I admire flexibility, openness, the ability to approach a problem in more than one way. Fixed thinking drives me batty! Gwen's constant policewoman approach to things just bugs me. She's not a cop anymore, and she's working with an agency that's about as un-coplike as it gets. I wish they'd let her shake off some of that mental baggage.
Also, others may disagree, but if Torchwood has a heart, it's Ianto. Various thoughts to irritating crap in various episodes...
5. Small Worlds
If I'd had a gun I'd have shot my TV when Jack's old flame died and Gwen stayed right there as if she had some right to intrude on his grief. And the questions! MY GOD WOMAN, SHUT UP! She's horribly self-important.
All that boohooing about not having to worry about being stalked when she was a cop...well, go back to policework, then. Either stop complaining about the kitchen you're in, or go back to the kitchen you're used to. Yes, she irks me just a bit. ;-)
How much do I love the pterodactyl? That's one of the best things ever. It reinforces the idea they brought up with the fairies -- wild things far older than we know are still amongst us. I love that.
I hit the Mary Sue wall when they examined the prisoner in the cell. Tosh laid out all the specifics, but Gwen's the only one who put two and two together that you don't need necessarily need to be strangled in order to choke to death? COME ON. We all saw 'Silence of the Lambs.' ;-) Yes, it was very police procedurely, but I'd also like to see things done more as a group. Owen's the doctor, it would have been nice if that scene had been geared to show his knowledge of the subject.
6. Countrycide
Oddly enough, I actually liked it when Gwen and Owen got together. It was nice watching her fall from that high horse she's been prancing around on. Smug, moralizing cow.
8. They Keep Killing Suzie
I hate that Susie spent half the episode moaning about how Gwen was so special and smart and yakkity shmakkity whatever else she said. In true Mary Sue fashion, Gwen put on the Death Glove and *wazoom!* it worked for her right off the bat (a little too well). Also, what kind of a doofus would smuggle a known killer out of a secure (hahaha) station and take her on a road trip? If I were Jack, her ass would have been fired and heavily retconned for that stunt. If Gwen's the best and the brightest, I fear for the future of the planet. Way to kill Suzie's dad, you idiot.
9. Random Shoes
Also in classic Mary Sue form, Gwen (naturally) was the one Eugene crushed on.
If Gwen crossed over into the Doctor Who universe, I'd stop watching the show. Immediately.
Gwen and Jack are completely mismatched and would be hideously wrong together, no matter what the writers think. If they ever hook up, I may have to stop watching.
I hate Gwen. I hate that she has more screentime than everyone else, including John Barrowman, who's the reason I started watching the show. I hate that when Jack is onscreen, his time is monopolized by Gwen. She's way too over the Mary Sue line for me to connect with her as a character. I love it when Jack rips into her -- and that's probably really evil of me.
OH MY GOD, I want to smack them all (except Jack) sometimes, and if he's paired up with Gwen next season, I'll want to smack him all the time. And possibly boot him in the ass as well. We'll see.
Ianto is just too adorable and I want to eat him with a spoon. I'd like to see him take Gwen's place in the field; Gwen could have the major domo duties since she likes all that linear thinking and by-the-book stuff. ;-)
Overall though, I like the show and I cannot wait until the fabulous Martha Jones (from Doctor Who season three) shows up. Much love for Martha! I'm gay not only for Martha, but for the adorably gorgeous actress who portrays her, the adorably gorgeous Freema Agyeman. Freema is my official new girl crush. But I digress.
I love when people are open about any- and everything. I admire flexibility, openness, the ability to approach a problem in more than one way. Fixed thinking drives me batty! Gwen's constant policewoman approach to things just bugs me. She's not a cop anymore, and she's working with an agency that's about as un-coplike as it gets. I wish they'd let her shake off some of that mental baggage.
Also, others may disagree, but if Torchwood has a heart, it's Ianto. Various thoughts to irritating crap in various episodes...
5. Small Worlds
If I'd had a gun I'd have shot my TV when Jack's old flame died and Gwen stayed right there as if she had some right to intrude on his grief. And the questions! MY GOD WOMAN, SHUT UP! She's horribly self-important.
All that boohooing about not having to worry about being stalked when she was a cop...well, go back to policework, then. Either stop complaining about the kitchen you're in, or go back to the kitchen you're used to. Yes, she irks me just a bit. ;-)
How much do I love the pterodactyl? That's one of the best things ever. It reinforces the idea they brought up with the fairies -- wild things far older than we know are still amongst us. I love that.
I hit the Mary Sue wall when they examined the prisoner in the cell. Tosh laid out all the specifics, but Gwen's the only one who put two and two together that you don't need necessarily need to be strangled in order to choke to death? COME ON. We all saw 'Silence of the Lambs.' ;-) Yes, it was very police procedurely, but I'd also like to see things done more as a group. Owen's the doctor, it would have been nice if that scene had been geared to show his knowledge of the subject.
6. Countrycide
Oddly enough, I actually liked it when Gwen and Owen got together. It was nice watching her fall from that high horse she's been prancing around on. Smug, moralizing cow.
8. They Keep Killing Suzie
I hate that Susie spent half the episode moaning about how Gwen was so special and smart and yakkity shmakkity whatever else she said. In true Mary Sue fashion, Gwen put on the Death Glove and *wazoom!* it worked for her right off the bat (a little too well). Also, what kind of a doofus would smuggle a known killer out of a secure (hahaha) station and take her on a road trip? If I were Jack, her ass would have been fired and heavily retconned for that stunt. If Gwen's the best and the brightest, I fear for the future of the planet. Way to kill Suzie's dad, you idiot.
9. Random Shoes
Also in classic Mary Sue form, Gwen (naturally) was the one Eugene crushed on.
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no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 03:31 am (UTC)Freema should be a stunning addition to the cast, and I'm looking forward to James Marsters' guest appearance next season as well. there's so much to love about the series, if only that total Mary Sue were gone
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 03:56 am (UTC)How funny is it that when I first glanced at your comment I thought you'd written: "I'd be thrilled if she were crushed..." Talk about wishful thinking. ;-)
She's an awful character. I've never liked her, and I've always wondered why the Torchies seem to think she's the best thing since alien sliced bread. ::is baffled::
Freema should be a stunning addition to the cast, and I'm looking forward to James Marsters' guest appearance next season as well. there's so much to love about the series, if only that total Mary Sue were gone
My grrrrrrrrlfriend! I *love* her. I'd really love to see some sparkage with Jack, but I know I won't get that lucky, dammit.
For all of the show's faults, I really do enjoy it, but it would be heaven on earth if Gwen was either sucked into the rift (PRAISE JESUS!), or went back to the police force and had more of a liason relationship so I didn't have to see her/hear her onscreen CONSTANTLY. So irritating.
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 03:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 04:04 am (UTC)No accountability at all. She does whatever the hell she feels is Moral and Correct at the time, damn the fallout.
That thing with Suzie amazed me. I'd expect that from some naive teen (or a four year old), but a woman who used to be a cop, for crying out loud? Are you serious? That one episode contained more idiocy than should be legally allowed on TV. Well...that one and the others I mentioned.
I kept waiting for her to choke on the pizza as she cried. Sadly, it didn't happen. :-(
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 04:16 am (UTC)Suzie. GAH!! It had the potential to be a good ep and it went to hell quickly.
Eugene. WTF!? There was NO NEED for that ep at all.
The only thing I can think of is that JB is so busy doing his CD and interviews that he's not there that much. And no offense, I HATE it when I'm told by LJers to watch this show because "of that gay actor who is the lead!!". I know he's gay...but why not just tell me how good an actor he is?? Yes, he should be proud of his gayness (and not the Lance proud. eww.) but um...it doesn't effect the show for me. Maybe he needs to have his people work more on the show than on the image. But that's show biz, something I know nothing about.
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 04:44 am (UTC)LOL! No kidding! They're like a bunch of really bright fourth graders sometimes.
Suzie. GAH!! It had the potential to be a good ep and it went to hell quickly.
I agree, they could have done something really interesting with the episode. I hate that it turned into a "Gwen is so fabulous, I'm so awful" festival o' suck.
Eugene. WTF!? There was NO NEED for that ep at all.
I KNOW! Biggest time-waster ever. EVER.
I know he's gay...but why not just tell me how good an actor he is??
I agree! And he is wonderful; I'm so excited about Jack and Martha teaming up in the next season! Yay! :-D They have great chemistry.
I read on his site that he was up for 'Will' in Will & Grace, but didn't get it because he seemed too straight...so they gave the part to a straight man. Yeah, that makes sense.
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 04:44 am (UTC)Anyway i just came to squee at the fact that Martha will be on Torchwood! woo!
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 04:56 am (UTC)LOL! For all of my ranting and my Gwen-hate, I do enjoy the show. It's got it's big, gaping flaws, but -- and I'm not sure why -- I keep watching. It probably has a lot to do with Jack, Ianto (triple squee!) and the pterodactyl. I love the pterodactyl. I want one.
Anyway i just came to squee at the fact that Martha will be on Torchwood! woo!
Woo, indeed! I'm truly all squirmy thinking about it! I want her to go on in the Whoverse forever! I'd love to see her return as a full-time companion in season five, but I'm not even going to get my hopes up. Still! I can dream!
I love the icon. It looks like it should be animated so she goes down and then pops back up. :-D
no subject
Date: 2007-11-20 06:39 am (UTC)Oh the pterodactyl was so cute. I wish the Doctor would keep a few awesome animals like that wandering around the TARDIS.
"I love the icon. It looks like it should be animated so she goes down and then pops back up. :-D"
Me too. :D Feel free to take and credit to
no subject
Date: 2007-11-21 01:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-11-21 02:50 am (UTC)Hello, thank you and yes! :-) I've friended you as well.
The drabble fest is waaaaaaaaay too much fun. I need to finish up my Who holiday piece since time's running out! But drabbling keeps singing its seductive, evil little song and I can't resist. ;-)