Did you ever write a story...

[foxmonkey]

...that was nothing like the story you had in your head? And not neccesarily in a good way?

Scotty and were talking, and I confessed that The Age of Love is nothing like the "private love affair" story I had in my mind. I wondered where the hell I'd gone wrong, and we bounced it back and forth a bit, but the upshot is, no, the story that's currently unfolding isn't the vision I originally had.

So what happened? I have no idea. But I do know that I'm not cut out for (as I put it) "watch me while I write" writing, and that's probably the main reason I don't post snippets, and it's why I'm such a slow writer.

My writing is a bloody, messy process. I come up with an idea, write it, chop it up, put it through a blender and take another look. Most probably it will go through another few butchering processes before I'm ready to have another pair of eyes take a look. And then I edit again.

It's beyond slow, and it can be very frustrating - especially when something I'm still working on shows up in someone else's story - but it's just the way I write. The LJ experiment has definitely been fun, and even though I'm not writing the story I envisioned, I'm still writing, and I'm sharing in a way I usually don't, so it's been a success that way.

I'll finish the story, but it's not the story. And I think coming to terms with that will kick the hell out of the block that's coming between me and the end of this thing.

I love writing, love it, love it, love it, even the twisty horrible bits that make me pull my hair out. I've been writing since I could hold a pencil, and I doubt that I'll be stopping anytime soon. Dancers gotta dance, singers gotta sing, writers gotta write. I write, therefore I am.

It's horrible and wonderful, and I love it, I hate it, and I'll never give it up.

Comments

[ibythetide.livejournal.com]

But you're growing and adapting with this story which is a good thing. Sure, it's not what you had planned for it to be exactly, but this isn't the story that sits for weeks, marinating in your brain until you get it just right. And I know you've come to terms with everything, but I just wanted to put my nosey 2 cents in.

Also: do you know where I could find a picture of a jar of butterscotch? I only ask because you always have such awesome pictures for your stories and icons. I'm working on a new layout and all. And I not only opened Everything, I wrote paragraphs! Actual paragraphs, not just a sentence here and there. Just for you.

[foxmonkey.livejournal.com]

God, sorry I haven't responded before now...I've two straight days of hell at work. Yesterday was busy, busy, busy, and I worked nine and half hours today. :-( Anyhoo...

What kind of pic are you looking for? Fuzzy focus, sharp, black/white, closeup...know what I mean? I'll look through my fave sites and send you some links. If you can find an example of the kind of thing you're looking for (straight on, at an angle), I might be able to find something. I'll be looking!

More Everything! For me! Yes, I'm squeeing like a mofo. ;-) And thanks for your nosy two cents. *smoochies*

Re:

[ibythetide.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking something kind of close up and in color. Honestly, I'm at the point where it could be a jar of honey and I'll use photoshop to change it to my needs. I just need a picture before this latest layout design goes up in smoke.