Did you ever write a story...
Aug. 22nd, 2002 08:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
foxmonkey...that was nothing like the story you had in your head? And not neccesarily in a good way?
Scotty and were talking, and I confessed that The Age of Love is nothing like the "private love affair" story I had in my mind. I wondered where the hell I'd gone wrong, and we bounced it back and forth a bit, but the upshot is, no, the story that's currently unfolding isn't the vision I originally had.
So what happened? I have no idea. But I do know that I'm not cut out for (as I put it) "watch me while I write" writing, and that's probably the main reason I don't post snippets, and it's why I'm such a slow writer.
My writing is a bloody, messy process. I come up with an idea, write it, chop it up, put it through a blender and take another look. Most probably it will go through another few butchering processes before I'm ready to have another pair of eyes take a look. And then I edit again.
It's beyond slow, and it can be very frustrating - especially when something I'm still working on shows up in someone else's story - but it's just the way I write. The LJ experiment has definitely been fun, and even though I'm not writing the story I envisioned, I'm still writing, and I'm sharing in a way I usually don't, so it's been a success that way.
I'll finish the story, but it's not the story. And I think coming to terms with that will kick the hell out of the block that's coming between me and the end of this thing.
I love writing, love it, love it, love it, even the twisty horrible bits that make me pull my hair out. I've been writing since I could hold a pencil, and I doubt that I'll be stopping anytime soon. Dancers gotta dance, singers gotta sing, writers gotta write. I write, therefore I am.
It's horrible and wonderful, and I love it, I hate it, and I'll never give it up.
Scotty and were talking, and I confessed that The Age of Love is nothing like the "private love affair" story I had in my mind. I wondered where the hell I'd gone wrong, and we bounced it back and forth a bit, but the upshot is, no, the story that's currently unfolding isn't the vision I originally had.
So what happened? I have no idea. But I do know that I'm not cut out for (as I put it) "watch me while I write" writing, and that's probably the main reason I don't post snippets, and it's why I'm such a slow writer.
My writing is a bloody, messy process. I come up with an idea, write it, chop it up, put it through a blender and take another look. Most probably it will go through another few butchering processes before I'm ready to have another pair of eyes take a look. And then I edit again.
It's beyond slow, and it can be very frustrating - especially when something I'm still working on shows up in someone else's story - but it's just the way I write. The LJ experiment has definitely been fun, and even though I'm not writing the story I envisioned, I'm still writing, and I'm sharing in a way I usually don't, so it's been a success that way.
I'll finish the story, but it's not the story. And I think coming to terms with that will kick the hell out of the block that's coming between me and the end of this thing.
I love writing, love it, love it, love it, even the twisty horrible bits that make me pull my hair out. I've been writing since I could hold a pencil, and I doubt that I'll be stopping anytime soon. Dancers gotta dance, singers gotta sing, writers gotta write. I write, therefore I am.
It's horrible and wonderful, and I love it, I hate it, and I'll never give it up.
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no subject
Date: 2002-08-22 07:01 pm (UTC)Lord, how I hate that song; I remain firmly unconvinced of his genius.
I haven't come *close* to cleaning out my closet. I probably have thirty fic starts just waiting to become fully formed. It's very sad.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-22 07:10 pm (UTC)I really do.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-22 07:25 pm (UTC)I know the feeling - I was thinking that this afternoon. I. Just. Quit.
I'll read something that makes me grag huge fistfuls of my hair and just scream; tonight those somethings would be Kaelie's Birthday, and the next bit of Gale's Time-shifiting fic. Just...guh, kill me now.
::bangs head on desk::
Why do I even bother? Seriously. Oh yeah, I love to write. That's it.
::bangs head on desk, hurls computer out of window::
no subject
Date: 2002-08-22 07:47 pm (UTC)Anyway, Gale's story is here.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-22 07:53 pm (UTC):)
But all this talk of fishing and cutting bait . . . that's how I feel about writing. Do I like to fish? No. Do I like to CATCH fish? Oh yeah.
I never like writing as much as I do during that moment when I've finished something and am happy with it. The rest of the process makes me want to beat my head on my desk.
no subject
Date: 2002-08-23 01:32 pm (UTC)Oh, missed that the fist time through.
Tease! :-P