New Year's musing.

[foxmonkey]

It's 11:21pm, and I just saw (about friggin' HALF) of the Girlfriend video. JC makes my heart sing. *sigh*

I'm where just about every writer has been at one point or another - thinking of not doing this anymore.

You ask yourself, what's the point? I read amazing stories with original, interesting story lines, and I wonder why the hell I can't wring stuff like that out of my brain. Is it my imagination, or is everything I write the same? Someone told me once that my stuff is romantic, and it is, but I'm not sure I'm happy about that. I guess there's enough angst in my real life without visiting it upon five young men that I like to write sexy stories about. But angst is interesting, and fluffy stories where everyone ends up happy, aren't.

I want my stuff to be interesting, but it isn't, and that makes me anxious. It's there for a read, then it's gone, like an apple that you eat to fill the gaps before dinner. I want to be dinner, but that stick-to-your-ribs quality is missing in my fic.

New Year's Resolution: To not suck, fic-wise.

How to accomplish New Year's Resolution: Not a damn clue.

Comments

[asilvahalo.livejournal.com]

hey, if you want any help, i'm offering beta services. :)

[foxmonkey.livejournal.com]

Ohmigod...proof that my worst fears are true. The suckage exists. *whimper*

Thanks. *slinking off to cry*

You ROCK!!!

[foxmonkey.livejournal.com]

Wiping the tears away long enough to tell you that your JC/Chris skin/blood/ripping/tearing story rocked hard. I'm the world's worst when it comes to feedback, and should have told you that when I read it the other day. Anyway, you rule, and you're part of my fic-angst! Your stories show me whereof I lack and make me both happy (because I love your stuff) and sad ('cause I didn't write them). Aiiiiii!

Re: You ROCK!!!

[asilvahalo.livejournal.com]

first of all, honey, i did not mean that your fic was bad. i meant that if you feel bad about your fic, i'm offering to help you feel not-bad about it. sometimes having someone help you out with your fic and say "this is good" and "this isn't" really helps the process of forming a story. i love my betas, but sometimes i wish they beat me up more.

also, just because you're not writing incredibly edgy things doesn't make you a bad writer. i mean, look at helen. in her sentinel stories, she had a series called "Conventions A Go-Go" that was all about writing stories with completely clicheed plots in just the slightest different way.

Plus, while you may think we're all off here being all edgy and dramatic and coming up with this stuff on our own? "skin," for example, was a complete rip-off of the style of another author. It's just about where you get your inspiration from.

If you want someone to discuss and develop bunnies with? i'm also here.

but really? mainly just writing a lot helps develops style and plot-development. so if you're really feeling bad (which you shouldn't!) that's what i suggest most :)

also, thank you for the feedback, but remember just because you thinks someone else is good doesn't mean that you aren't good too. :)

Re: You ROCK!!!

[foxmonkey.livejournal.com]

I'd love to work with you, thanks!

I had a great beta in my former fandom, and told her that she could be hard on me. I was also a fan of her writing, and I respected her ideas and her suggestions. She's not into boybands, though. ;-)

The weird thing is that I've lived enough angst for eighty-five lifetimes, I devoured horror and sci-fi like a fiend, and I've read hundreds of books (thousands!), but I can't seem to come up with what I think are interesting ideas...Maybe I'm just too much in my own head? Oy, now I have a headahce.

Thanks, also, for the compliments. :-)