New JC album review - Village Voice
May. 4th, 2004 02:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
foxmonkeyMore JC stuff than you can shake a stick at! Just try it! Go on, shake that stick! I'm on vacation, I'm allowed to be weird. Anyhoo.
Posted by ang2797 at You-Know-Where. Check out that last line. Holy moley. ;-) They like it!
Blame It On Band Camp
by Mikael Wood
Villiage Voice
Two years or so ago, heavyweight r&b producer Dallas Austin was in Los Angeles putting together the soundtrack for Drumline, a putatively star-making vehicle for Nick Cannon, Nickelodeon's G-rated Dave Chappelle, thinly veiled as that rare Hollywood specimen: the breezily moralistic marching-band dramedy. *NSync's JC Chasez was in town too, "just chilling," he told me a few months ago, so one day Austin called him up and recommended he drop by the studio. Within days the pair had written "Blowin' Me Up (With Her Love)," a nutso hunk of chopping-board funk (with an actual drumline!) whose flavor long outlasted the film's.
That must've sucked for Cannon, but I bet the young star's even more peeved now that Chasez's solo debut has eclipsed his own self-titled bow, the cover of which features him snuggled inside the same fur-lined parka Paul Simon sported on his eponymous debut, in 1972. Cannon's problem isn't his so-so flow or, as befits an experienced bizzer, his taste in collaborators: Big-ticket beatsmith Just Blaze, a little adrift now that his Blueprint classmate Kanye West dropped out and turned on, laces "Get Crunk Shorty" with paranoid synth stabs, and R. Kelly turns "Gigolo" (a title Kelly's lawyers probably stress over daily) into pure fur-lined pleasure. Rather, it's the actor's inability to shake the pork from his fork that hamstrings Nick Cannon. He brags about expensive cars and inconsequential sex, but in jarringly likable after-school fashion; when Mary J. Blige flexes her Gucci-bagged gravitas in "Whenever You Need Me," she comes off like Cannon's mom calling him home for dinner.
On the agreeably pervtastic Schizophrenic, Chasez sounds as eager to shed his cream-cheese boyband image as Cannon seems to ditch his squeaky 'tween-TV profile. Mainly that means slipping off his SpongeBob SquarePants; though Justin Timberlake's Justified no doubt gets Cameron Diaz thinking very bad things, JC's record boasts a virtual vanilla sky of engorged Caucasian flesh: nightclub lesbianism, bedtime masturbation, waking-hour fantasy, one-night-only monogamy. Yet where Cannon macks like he's in an audition, Chasez really sells his @#%$, accessing a battery of convincing moans in "Shake It," overdubbing a choir of groans in "Come to Me," even graciously thinking up "100 Ways" to freak your lover. And the songs' grooves, courtesy of Basement Jaxx, Riprock 'n' Alex G, and Paris Hilton pal Robb Boldt, back him up with a sonic palette wider if not deeper than Justified's. If Chasez ever pees on somebody, I'd recommend covering this one up quick.
JC! Golden showers. Oh my god. :-D
Posted by ang2797 at You-Know-Where. Check out that last line. Holy moley. ;-) They like it!
Blame It On Band Camp
by Mikael Wood
Villiage Voice
Two years or so ago, heavyweight r&b producer Dallas Austin was in Los Angeles putting together the soundtrack for Drumline, a putatively star-making vehicle for Nick Cannon, Nickelodeon's G-rated Dave Chappelle, thinly veiled as that rare Hollywood specimen: the breezily moralistic marching-band dramedy. *NSync's JC Chasez was in town too, "just chilling," he told me a few months ago, so one day Austin called him up and recommended he drop by the studio. Within days the pair had written "Blowin' Me Up (With Her Love)," a nutso hunk of chopping-board funk (with an actual drumline!) whose flavor long outlasted the film's.
That must've sucked for Cannon, but I bet the young star's even more peeved now that Chasez's solo debut has eclipsed his own self-titled bow, the cover of which features him snuggled inside the same fur-lined parka Paul Simon sported on his eponymous debut, in 1972. Cannon's problem isn't his so-so flow or, as befits an experienced bizzer, his taste in collaborators: Big-ticket beatsmith Just Blaze, a little adrift now that his Blueprint classmate Kanye West dropped out and turned on, laces "Get Crunk Shorty" with paranoid synth stabs, and R. Kelly turns "Gigolo" (a title Kelly's lawyers probably stress over daily) into pure fur-lined pleasure. Rather, it's the actor's inability to shake the pork from his fork that hamstrings Nick Cannon. He brags about expensive cars and inconsequential sex, but in jarringly likable after-school fashion; when Mary J. Blige flexes her Gucci-bagged gravitas in "Whenever You Need Me," she comes off like Cannon's mom calling him home for dinner.
On the agreeably pervtastic Schizophrenic, Chasez sounds as eager to shed his cream-cheese boyband image as Cannon seems to ditch his squeaky 'tween-TV profile. Mainly that means slipping off his SpongeBob SquarePants; though Justin Timberlake's Justified no doubt gets Cameron Diaz thinking very bad things, JC's record boasts a virtual vanilla sky of engorged Caucasian flesh: nightclub lesbianism, bedtime masturbation, waking-hour fantasy, one-night-only monogamy. Yet where Cannon macks like he's in an audition, Chasez really sells his @#%$, accessing a battery of convincing moans in "Shake It," overdubbing a choir of groans in "Come to Me," even graciously thinking up "100 Ways" to freak your lover. And the songs' grooves, courtesy of Basement Jaxx, Riprock 'n' Alex G, and Paris Hilton pal Robb Boldt, back him up with a sonic palette wider if not deeper than Justified's. If Chasez ever pees on somebody, I'd recommend covering this one up quick.
JC! Golden showers. Oh my god. :-D
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no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 11:25 am (UTC)Am I being stupid?
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 11:45 am (UTC)It seemed good to me, yes. :-) I agree, that last line is completely baffling. Someone mentioned R. Kelly peeing on a youn girl...could that be it? Sexual perversions and such??? That made my brain hurt. ;-)
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 11:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 12:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 11:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 12:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 01:12 pm (UTC)::breathes deep::
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAAH
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 02:24 pm (UTC)What she said. Oh, yes, and someone MUST be up on their R. Kelly trivia, because Dave chappelle made a cover of 'Iginition' and it's remix as 'piss on u'. It's some of the funniest things I ever have heard.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 04:02 pm (UTC)Chappelle is on some *serious* crack. Wait...I think I saw that! No, I'm thinking of the Playa Hata's Ball, I think. ::snort::
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 03:50 pm (UTC)::breathes deep::
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAAH
Tuesday, May 4th, 2004 08:12 pm
BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
::breathes deep::
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAAH
That just killed me. ;-)
no subject
Date: 2004-05-04 09:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-05 11:25 am (UTC)These JC reviews are gifts that keep on giving.
"JC Chasez, NSync's dark-haired beauty has an album that's a grower, not a shower. Chasez himself is an agreeably pervtastic, affable hipster, and a Grammy contender in his own right."
Bwahahaha! :-)